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2. Eight Survival Strategies for Working Women
– by Rajeev B Bhatnagar
"Where women are respected, Gods reside there." -
Rig Veda
Story Line
"Wake up the children, cook for them & Surendra (husband), send kids
to school and him to office, then I get ready, pack my lunchbox and
catch the train to office. Buy vegetables on the way back in
evening, cook dinner, eat & drop to sleep. Rajeev, life has become
very mechanical," Madhu told me.
She had painted a picture of the last 10 years of her life - at
least of 85% days in those 10 years - when I met her after that many
years.
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Doing Double Shifts
The proportion of Working Women, who have chosen a full-time career,
is increasing very fast in the work-force. All Working Women
actually have to cope up with two full-time jobs. First is their
full-time career in office or factory where they are expected to
perform as well as the men around them. Second is women's
traditional role of running a house hold and making a home out of it
where the expectations are to same as from the traditional full time
house-wife.
Stress: Source & Effect
Two full-time jobs, both with high expectations, definitely put the
modern Working Women under high & sustained stress. No wonder when
another colleague said, "I am so tired when I reach home on most
days that I just eat whatever is available (cooked by
mother-in-law), lie down in the bed, talk to children for 10 - 15
minutes, and pop-off to sleep". She is luckier than, because MIL
takes care of her 2 kids and husband is grown-up!
"I
Choose Stress"
In spite of high & sustained stress that Working Women face,
over-whelming majority of them do not want to go back to being a
full-time house wife or home-maker. Let us accept this fact and
leave the reasons for their choice for the time being.
East or West ….
The challenges Working Women face - having two fulltime jobs, high
and sustained stress - are similar across all countries. Gary
Dessler writes typifying the American situation, "… the
responsibilities of raising the children and managing the household
still fall disproportionately on women." (1) In the western
countries also Working Women are expected to perform the duties and
roles of the full-time house-wife. Similarly, having an elderly
parent or a domestic help in house may reduce the burden but does
not remove it completely. There can be difference in degree of
challenge but not of kind.
Eight Survival Strategies
There are some of the strategies that Working Women have found
useful to successfully manage their two jobs, reduce stress levels,
and reduce to guilt feeling that they may be neglecting their
families.
Here are five which Peg Jordan
(2) listed recently:
- Strive for balance, not perfection: Decide what is
important and prioritize that list. Take up the top priorities in
the allotted time and let the rest go until tomorrow. In other
words, learn to live with the "undone".
- Gather your team: You are the CEO of your household, so
recruit co-operative players. Divide important tasks and get a
"buy-in" from your husband, children, parents / in-laws and anyone
else that can lend a hand.
- Don't neglect self-care: You deserve it! Give yourself
a facial, take a milk bath, drink the fruit juice you love, …
- Practice Good Humor: One of the signs of doing too much
is losing your sense of humor. Find the crazy side of your day and
learn to laugh with good friends. Adjusting your attitude this way
will put you in good mood, help you smile and relax. Choosing
humor does not give you any advantage over others; it is just that
you choose to see the cup as half-full rather than half-empty.
- Set your limits: Even the most well managed Working
Woman needs to say "No" to being overloaded. This applies to both
work as well as home. There comes a point where you should not try
to improve your ability to cope with overload of stressors -
instead you should learn to be assertive and say you have had
enough.
A few of my (women) colleagues have added
three more strategies which they
find useful:
- Learn to relax: Go out on Sundays & holidays with your
loved ones. In these outing, eat out, or visit friends &
relatives, or go to a party, or hold one yourself, or visit a park
or a place. Take a break, plan and take your annual holidays.
- Share your feelings: Tell your husband & other family
members when you are overloaded at work. This is likely to make
them more considerate and accommodating towards you.
- Exercise regularly: The minimum requirement is 12
minutes per day, at least 3 days a week! Sound easy!
The above 8 strategies can help working women to have the best of
both worlds - work they enjoy and families that they love!
Role of Human Resource
Over last 50 years there is a steady increase in proportion of
Working Women in workforce worldwide and has reached 40% in the USA.
However, in historical time frame women in workforce are relatively
new social phenomena, partly a result of Women's Lib Movement of
1960s in West.
HR Professionals need to understand the Working Women's situation
and empathize with them.
They have a definite role in sensitizing others to it when they find
the scales tilted against Working Women due to unrealistic
expectations. There is need to create "family friendly" workplaces.
Working Women have untapped potential for contributing in workforce.
In fact two studies found "that women scored significantly higher
than men on all measures of transformational leadership."(3) Most of
us will agree that full utilization of human potential is the aim of
HR.
Our Value System
I began this article with a quote which is over 3000 years old.
Please review it because it is actually a "Value Statement."
Irrespective of how far the external reality & our internal reality
is from the quote, we as a society have to move in the direction
indicated by the Quote.
References:
(1) Human Resource Management, Gary Dessler, 8th Edition, Page
368-369
(2) Peg Jordan in The Hindu dated May 4th, 2003
(3) Gary Dessler, Page 274
(4) When Mothers Work: Loving our Children Without Sacrificing
Ourselves: Joan Peters
Contributed by Rajeev B Bhatnagar,
Dy General manager, Larsen & Toubro Limited, Chennai.
Email: Rajeev@HREra.com
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